Book Review: The Accidental Assassin

The Accidental Assassin by Jan Toms

Recommended for: People who like Donald Westlake, “Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels,” and “Noises Off.”

The Accidental Assassin by Jan Toms is a farce — a beautiful, elegantly woven, farce. I loved it.

I picked up the book on a whim because it was on sale. Now, I want to buy a copy for half the people I know because it’s so much fun.

Victor Green is a mild-mannered civil servant. He falls out of a tree and happens to kill a mobster. Therein starts the fun. Victor is a quiet little milquetoast of a man. He has very little sense of adventure and stammers when he gets nervous. He adopts the mobster’s dog in remorse for killing the poor dog’s master.

Then he gets a random check with a small slip of paper. He’s suddenly 20,000 pounds richer. And has no idea what to do next.

Soon enough there’s another death and another check. Victor’s got a girlfriend who’s the Constable’s daughter. There’s a love story in the midst of the gathering gang war. Poor Victor’s in the middle — not quite sure how he got there — and trying to figure out what seems to be a horrible misunderstanding.

It’s a happily ever after with bullets and poodles. I really don’t want to say too much more because to reveal it is to ruin it.

Definitely read it though.

Cross-posted on


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